Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
