I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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