i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
