Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
