i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
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