before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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