You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize