dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
This is the high leading the old right now
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize