This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
Barsexuality is the new black.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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