Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
