just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize