Texts From Last Night

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  (480): View more from Arizona

  WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.

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  (480): WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE. http://tfl.nu/0o9o
  Replies (4) Good night (608) Bad night (1766) Order T-Shirt
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo

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  (803): You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo http://tfl.nu/7wt5
  Replies (35) Good night (3936) Bad night (490) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.

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  (206): I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days. http://tfl.nu/extb
  Replies (18) Good night (4770) Bad night (480) Order T-Shirt
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth

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  (414): it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth http://tfl.nu/rgv0
  Replies (19) Good night (810) Bad night (4525) Order T-Shirt
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.

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  (816): I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear. http://tfl.nu/e1lf
  Replies (50) Good night (721) Bad night (6354) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.

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  (310): Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you. http://tfl.nu/vvmp
  Replies (21) Good night (5919) Bad night (1342) Order T-Shirt
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.

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  (240): So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak. http://tfl.nu/34fx
  Replies (30) Good night (5568) Bad night (812) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came

  (323): View more from California

  i love that song!

  (818): View more from California

  NOT THE POINT

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  (818): he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came (323): i love that song! (818): NOT THE POINT http://tfl.nu/7i6t
  Replies (19) Good night (7294) Bad night (1191)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.

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  (937): The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15. http://tfl.nu/cktg
  Replies (24) Good night (1175) Bad night (4189) Order T-Shirt
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.

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  (484): I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night. http://tfl.nu/i8lc
  Replies (4) Good night (857) Bad night (3854) Order T-Shirt
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  (954): View more from Florida

  in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.

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  (954): in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume. http://tfl.nu/xcgb
  Replies (8) Good night (3334) Bad night (492) Order T-Shirt
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  (415): View more from California

  Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.

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  (415): Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits. http://tfl.nu/q1hp
  Replies (8) Good night (661) Bad night (1214) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT

  (440): View more from Ohio

  COME TO THE BLANKET FORT

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  (440): OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT (440): COME TO THE BLANKET FORT http://tfl.nu/1mvf
  Replies (4) Good night (1207) Bad night (501)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again

  (1-425): View more from Washington

  But he was really hot

  (1-425): View more from Washington

  Glad you don't have HIV

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  (425): I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again (1-425): But he was really hot (1-425): Glad you don't have HIV http://tfl.nu/se36
  Replies (4) Good night (324) Bad night (794) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.

  (815): View more from Illinois

  This is why you're my favorite.

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  (773): if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass. (815): This is why you're my favorite. http://tfl.nu/6wk2
  Replies (3) Good night (1341) Bad night (281)

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