Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I currently don't understand fingers.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
