Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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