Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
