we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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