i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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