closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize