Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Randomize
