Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
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