I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
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