That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
My liver just had a heart attack.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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