hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Randomize
