Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I accidentally had phone sex last night
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
