We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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