Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Randomize
