I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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