I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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