some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
