Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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