So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
