on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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