I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Your tits are I can't wait for
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Randomize
