it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize