Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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