But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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