the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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