3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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