I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
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