ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
