i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
