I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Randomize
