I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
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