I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
