Midget sex pt 2 tonight
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Randomize
