I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize