They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
