Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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