Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
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