just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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