is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Boobs are out for the taking
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize