so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
