My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
